Well, I’ve just dropped the baby for her first school stay and play session (excuse me while I go and cry into a pillow and wonder how the hell that has happened!), so I have a spare 45 minutes or so as I didn’t read the email properly and thought I would also be doing the staying and the playing, but apparently not- luckily she went in quite happily and hopefully I’ll pick up a smiling child in a bit. Things have been the normal crazy hectic the last couple of weeks so I haven’t had a chance to sit and blog so here goes.

We had a mixed half term, it felt busy but also fairly chilled all mixed into one. We started each morning watching ‘Simon’ at breakfast- Britain’s got talent, but I’m sure you can see who the kid’s favourite judge is. We enjoyed a couple of trips to the woods and the beach. The trip to the woods ended up looking more like a comedy sketch show with the amount of bumps everyone ended up with. Clara took a rope swing to the face and skinned her knee on the walk home. I was helping Polly get onto a rope swing when we both misjudged what was happening and she kneed me in the vagina, this left me bent over crying whilst also laughing as she was left hanging onto the rope at the wrong angle also laughing at the state of me. Altogether a fairly amusing series of events.

Having them home all day did make studying a bit trickier, so we usually went out for the morning and then the kids settled down with a film whilst I hit the books. It did mean I introduced them to a couple of films that aren’t all Disney songs and dances. One day I decided to show them one I thought they’d enjoy, whilst also preparing them that the ending is a bit sad- Marley and me. I was right in the sense that they laughed all the way through and thought he was a hilariously naughty dog. However, I clearly did not warn them enough as to how sad the sad bit would be. Polly was fine as she’d understood I meant the dog was going to die (spoiler alert for anyone living under a rock who hasn’t seen it), the little 2 though did not get this vibe and both dissolved into apocalyptic sobs at the last scene. They had lots of cuddles and are clearly not scarred for life as they asked to watch it again the next day- with less tears the next attempt. It did lead to one bedtime where Clara got a bit upset as she was concerned that Henry was going to ‘take the kitty cat away to the doctor and we never see him again,’ but she’s been assured that little terror still has plenty of life left in him. It did also make for a slightly darker version of ‘vets’ the next day- instead of the usual where they just colour a teddy in with red pen and pretend they have chicken pox, they upped it slightly and Sooty had a lot more red pen on him where he’d suffered a catastrophic injury that led him to be being buried instead of fixed back up. Seb then spent the next half an hour sat on a stool watching him actually get fixed whirling round in the washing machine.

We also snuck in a little trip into Exeter on the bus to run a couple of errands and visit the museum. This meant a McDonald’s for lunch which left me with the question of- why do kids need to go for a shit in the worst possible places? Both girls wanted to go in there, slightly traumatic experience when the toilets there are never the cleanest and it leaves you questioning the whole trip! Seb then gave us all a bit of a giggle with his incredible picture of the cat at a little craft area in the museum. And speaking of our delightful cat, he’d left us a nice little present on the patio for when we got home, a nice little gift with its guts hanging out across the path.

Seb is still making us giggle with his mixing up of words asking us what our ‘destiny’ is instead of our destination, he’s now got another amusing phrase. The kids like looking at pictures and videos of themselves on my phone, but Seb keeps asking for an ‘episode’ like he’s literally watching a sitcom where these kids are the main characters. He definitely would be the comedic character if this was a sitcom, especially when you get notes coming home explaining that his bump to the head was from when he fell off a bench when another child was trying to give him a hug.

The last couple of weeks has also included both girls birthdays- yes I know, we didn’t plan that very well. We got Polly a bike, but had to keep it hidden in the car till her actual birthday, this meant when I finished at midnight the night before the actual big day I thought it’ll be easy enough to get it into house ready for the morning. Sadly not. I got to find out that the streetlights in the town go off at 12:30AM, just as I parked the car in the only available space right at the very top of the hill. The 10 minute walk down the hill in the dark with me attempting to steer the thing, with my phone light doing a naff job whilst also carrying my bag over my shoulder probably looked like another scene from a comedy show, there was a lot of silent cursing happening. And no, I would not have considered riding it down the hill (even if I could have got my leg over it) after the village shop incident. When Henry and I were in the early stages of our relationship, he took me out on a bike that didn’t have proper breaks and was too big for me and I crashed into a village shop and took all the vegetable stands out outside- I have not been on a pushbike since.

The birthdays themselves were fairly chilled out which was actually quite nice, I just can’t believe I now have an 8 year old, a 6 six year old and a baby who’s not a baby but is now in fact a 4 year old- just going to do some more sobbing. Well, I’m actually going to go and pick her up and hope she got on alright- the phone hasn’t rung so I’m fairly sure it’s gone ok, let’s go find out…

So, every year I do a little ‘day in the life’ blog where I write down everything I do in a 24 hour period, this year I’m doing it a little bit early as my blogging this year has been a bit all over the place and I don’t trust myself to remember to do one when I normally would! So here it is, Thursday 16th May 2024 (and I think it might be the craziest one yet)…

00:02AM- I’m just finishing my break at work, I’ve been studying whilst eating pasta. I grab a cup of tea and head back to my desk for the last 4 hours of my shift. It’s a really good bunch on tonight so it’s actually a fun shift which makes the time pass a lot quicker.

02:03AM- A walkabout outside to stretch the legs with my work Mama, we have a catch up whilst I eat a Ripple (best chocolate bar going in my opinion). I get another cup of tea to see me through the last stretch.

04:00AM- Finish work, scoff a biscuit and say goodbye.

04:03AM- Get in the car, it’s bloody freezing this morning. Drive home.

04:26AM- Park the car. Unlike a normal drive at this time I actually don’t see any living animals (something the kids love to hear about in the morning), just a dead badger so I think I’ll keep quiet about that one. There is a slight pink tinge in the distance as I amble down the hill.

04:32AM- In the house. Find Henry asleep on the sofa (not an unusual sight when I’m not here to prod him awake and upstairs). Feed the cat some treats to keep him quiet. Send Henry to bed. Check the kids. PJs on. Set alarm.

04:39AM- Climb into bed- nothing beats that feeling of crawling into bed after a night shift.

06:58AM- Clara awake. She climbs into bed for a cuddle.

07:04AM- Henry and Clara head downstairs as she’s unwilling to go back to sleep. I am very willing to go back to sleep.

08:05AM- Awake. Do some aimless scrolling on my phone. Get bundled by the girls. Make the kids beds.

08:12AM- Head downstairs. Make packed lunches for the big 2. Fill the water bottles up. Henry has made me a cup of tea. Put some toast on for myself. Do Polly’s hair. Dodge a flying toy aimed at my face from Clara.

08:24AM- Polly tries to be helpful and throws shoes to Seb but accidentally hits him in the face, Seb then has a meltdown. They are now running late.

08:35AM- Clara and I wave them all out the door. I throw the washing outside.

08:40AM- I put another load of washing outside.

08:45AM- I make Clara up a lunch. Set her up with Waffle dog whilst she plays a game and go for a shower.

08:46AM- Clara changes her mind and needs a poo instead.

08:51AM- Send Clara back downstairs and actually get in the shower. Then brush my teeth.

09:03AM- Dry hair and get dressed. Henry comes home, I get distracted by his story of Polly missing the mini-bus as she was late and one of the school mum’s saving the day when she spotted them walking up to the big school and gave them a lift up- Thanks Gill!

09:18AM- Get Clara dressed.

09:24AM- I put my contact lenses in. Do Clara’s hair. Put both our shoes on and say bye to Henry.

09:26AM- Out the door.

09:34AM- Arrive slightly late to Pandas (toddler group). We do some singing, some playing and generally have a natter with a cup of tea. Clara is Kirsty’s special helper again which she loves- although she seems to think that Kirsty is being her helper and she’s running the show! At some point we head outside into the garden where the kids carry on playing, we do a bit of crocheting and carry on our chats. It’s a lush way to spend a morning.

12:49PM- Clara and I head into town, we chat to some friends on the way down. I buy a new notebook.

13:09PM- We meet Laura at Dukes, get some hugs of Henry, order some cheesy chips and Clara has us in fits of giggles singing on the table for the whole patio.

13:52PM- We finish up and go and see the sea. Clara has a good play on the beach and we have a chat.

14:50PM- Say goodbye to Laura and leave the beach to head back up through town. We get distracted on our way by the same friends. Clara has a right laugh pretending to crash her scooter into Rob.

15:10PM- School pick up for Seb first. The kids have a play in the playground. I have a chat to some of the Mums.

15:35PM Polly’s mini bus gets in and we head home.

15:41PM- In the door. Snacks for the kids.

15:50PM- Seb does some reading. Polly is playing a game with her ponies right across the floor. Clara is having a whinge about something.

16:05PM- I practice Polly’s braids ready for her dance show at the weekend. Henry is watching tractor videos on the TV with Seb avidly watching too. Clara is still having a bit of a whinge.

16:20PM- I put tea on. Seb is now playing some shooting thing game which leaves me dodging him every time he comes near me. He’s trying to hit the ceiling with it so nothing is safe. Clara has finally stopped having a whinge and has joined Polly’s new game with all the farm animals out instead.

16:27PM-I sort the washing out. Water the plants (I mean I think the sunflowers have had it but I’ll keep trying as long as there’s some green stuff showing). I take a call from the dentist about Polly’s appointment in the morning. Seb is now playing a wild game with his tractor in the clothes airer as I do all this.

16:36PM- Ironing.

16:57PM- Serve the kids tea- it’s southern fried chicken and smiley stars.

17:03PM- Do some study reading whilst the kids eat.

17:19PM- Henry leaves to go back to work. CBeebies makes an appearance.

17:29PM- Have my tea- it’s pulled pork and new potatoes. Seb has a cup of milk and I make some angel delight. Take the contacts out.

17:50PM- I make the mistake of putting Seb in charge of serving the desert up. Clara decides she doesn’t like it so I feed her biscuits instead.

17:55PM- Washing up. Recycling outside and empty the bin. Wipe the kitchen sides down. The kids are in the garden inspecting their dying flowers. Feed the cat.

18:23PM- Tidy the living room.

18:35PM- Pull the kids back inside as they are banshee screaming at a seagull. Stick Britain’s got talent on. Open the textbook up again.

19:10PM- Head upstairs. Shower the kids. Get them dried and dressed for bed. Lay clothes out for tomorrow. Polly reads some Narnia (we are now on Prince Caspian). Do the bedtime routine.

19:50PM- Say first goodnight.

19:57PM- Say a second goodnight.

20:05PM- Make a cup of tea. Collapse on the sofa. Stick Emmerdale on (yes it is our guilty secret). Eat chocolate. Attempt to finish that bit of studying.

20:19PM- Say third goodnight to Polly. She is very nervous about the dentist in the morning and has asked to get in our bed. I’d never normally agree to it before we get in there but she’s already overtired and we have a very busy weekend ahead so I let her. Then I return to my sofa nest.

21:26PM- Finally finish the section in the textbook I’ve been working on. Then FINALLY… it’s Bridgerton time! Been waiting way to long for this.

22:31PM- I give up after one episode. As much as I’d love to binge the next 3 I’m hanging on by a thread so I’m bailing out and head upstairs to bed.

I’m truly exhausted but hey at least I got a few things done today!

It’s another wild Saturday evening in our house, Seb and I are watching Bluey together on the sofa, Polly is on the other sofa in her onesie writing a story about a horse and Clara is playing trains completely naked the other side of the room. I’m not really sure where the day has gone to be honest. We went to see Nanny and Pops this morning, Henry is working a split shift this afternoon/evening, I took the kids for a play by the river (that turned into a play in the river), we’ve watched a film, ‘baked’ some cakes and are now just vegged out. I keep trying to pack a lot into the Saturday’s as I’ve been working most Sunday’s so feel like I’ve lost half my weekend with the kids. Don’t be fooled into thinking it’s been all idyllic today though- Clara screamed from the house to the river that her legs wouldn’t work, I had a stupid amount of ironing to plough through and the kids have scheduled at least one fight every half an hour throughout the day.

Easter feels like it was several months ago already as does our little trip up to see the family in Suffolk. It was a fairly eventful trip up, the kids got to meet their new cousin (who is absolutely adorable), we had an interesting walk in the woods and we had a great trip to the soft play with friends (even if we all felt financially violated but the price). Our walk in the woods was meant to be a quick stop at at beauty spot that we used to go to as kids, a chance to eat a picnic in between family catch ups. Sadly, when you haven’t been somewhere for 20 years it can be tricky to remember which path to take when the map at the car park seems to have been drawn by a drunk octopus. At the car park, as we were changing into wellies, a group of ladies were coming back and said we’d definitely need those on as the path was ‘terribly muddy.’ We thanked them and headed off. Pretty soon we were smugly laughing about how tame the path was and how over-dramatic the old ladies had been- oh we regretted those words. Five minutes later and the path has turned into a replica of the Glastonbury campsite and the kids were crying for their lunch. We dragged ourselves through the mud-fest and half way round the woods finally found the pond with some benches that I could remember from my childhood. The kids calmed down again after some food and the rest of the walk was thankfully mud free.

Seb thought he’d add an interesting expense to our holiday whilst we were at my brother and his fiancé’s. Oli was teaching Polly to play chess after it turned out she had an interest in it from a previous family do, whilst the younger two played a bit of PlayStation. Faye and I were chatting on the sofa and both casually looked up at the screen and in a moment of slow motion horror realised what Seb was about to do, we both shouted for him to stop but of course he pressed the button anyway- purchasing £70 of game add-on’s that nobody really needed. Brilliant. At least it didn’t have another zero on the end.

He did have a hilarious word mix up that he kept doing that luckily makes him quite cute and forgivable. He kept mixing up ‘destiny’ with ‘destination’ so kept asking us each time we went to set off anywhere- “Where’s our destiny?”. And Clara’s cute mix up was that she didn’t quite understand the concept of ‘Suffolk.’ She was having full blown arguments with everyone, telling them they weren’t in Suffolk, that they were in their house and that she was leaving their house to go to Suffolk. I guess we need to add Geography to list of things to teach her, as well as wiping her arse properly and why we don’t lick our friends faces.

Unfortunately she has picked up another terrible word straight from my potty mouth (proof that I can teach her some stuff, even if it’s not the stuff I do want to pass on just yet). She’s using the word ‘fucking’ and she’s using it completely in context. One evening when we were leaving to head back to the hotel she agreed it was time to go with “yeah, because I fucking tired.” And then when we got caught in the rain it was “oh no, it’s fucking wet.”

The last couple of trips up I’ve struggled with keeping the kids occupied in the car and am so fed up of fucking I-spy that if the kids try and play another game of it I’ll sneak out at the next service station and jump in someone’s car for the remainder of the trip. So, this time I introduced them to ‘would you rather?’ This had hilarious consequences and filled many hours of the trip as the questions got more and more weird. I am still laughing at the fact that everyone I’ve since asked ‘would you rather be a wee or a poo?’ to has consistently voted the same way- it’s also been hilarious listening to people justify why the obvious answer is a wee of course.

Apart from her new potty mouth Clara has also given us another couple of giggles with her words recently. From declaring ‘oh no, I’ve got puddle in my wellie,’ to shouting ‘oh that kitty cat’s jowling is keeping me awake’ when I crawled into bed at 4AM after a night shift and disturbed the cat into run around like a dickhead mode (she meant meowing of course, but Henry and I are now sticking with calling it jowling).

Anyway it’s about time to sign off I think, Polly has just pulled out the scissors and has started making a boat from a box which is not the ideal activity five minutes before bed. I also need to turn Bluey off as I don’t want it to carry on and put me through the emotional abuse of watching ‘The Sign’ again until I’m quite ready for it. I actually cried the whole way through the bloody episode and then continued to cry for some time after whilst my sympathetic husband looked on with open mouth and the comforting words of “what the hell is wrong with you, it’s a cartoon about a family of blue dogs.” Don’t worry all you Bluey fans I soon put him in his place for his disrespectful comments and reminded him it is in fact the greatest kids show that’s ever been made!

I think this is one of the longest gaps I’ve had in blogging, I didn’t meant to leave it this long but life has thrown a few things our direction over the last couple of months and time has not been on my side.

Life has been extra chaotic over the last couple of weeks as we’ve had major water problems to deal with which have definitely made me appreciate the simple notion of turning on a tap a bit more. We had really low pressure for two weeks, the water company tried to fix it and instead made it worse and we wound up with no water. A blue pipe threaded through the letter box then became our water supply for the next few days whilst a new water connection was set up. All this meant that our fabulous plumber basically moved in and we got to know several South West water employees by name. Finally, after almost three weeks the house is back to normal and I’ve at least learnt what a stopcock is (now I’ve stopped asking if it’s a stopcock or a stop-clock).

The kids have been their usual bundle of crazy, the sarcasm from the girls is equally scaring me whilst also making me feel proud at the same time. We’ve finally ditched daytime nappies for Clara-bear which feels like a big step. Polly is spending every available minute drawing or reading The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, her drawing is getting better and better every week and the favourite story of the moment meant for an easy pick for a world book day costume last week (the only trouble now is getting her out of the lion onesie!).

Seb is going through a bit of a phase at the moment. He’s got some big emotions and did go through a bit of a ‘I don’t want to go to school’ phase the other week, but he’s also being extra cuddly and cute at other times. He has this new thing of creeping into our room when I’m sleeping in after a night shift, where he’ll sneak up to me and give me a kiss on the cheek and then run off before I’ve really registered that he’s in the room. It’s a much better wake up than Polly doing her silent stare at the side of the bed at 1AM.

Clara’s sense of humour has definitely got a wicked side, the other day Henry and I took her food shopping and when I leant over to her with an open shampoo bottle for her to smell she squeezed it and shot shampoo all over herself, me, the trolley and the floor! She then proceeded to crack up into hysterical fits of giggles- luckily the guy working round the corner who I went to grab thought it was hilarious.

There’s been the usual chaos of the kids with playdates, after school clubs, dentist appointments, illnesses, parties, tantrums, endless laundry, toddler groups, fighting. I also thought I’d crack a tooth at Henry’s birthday meal last week (on bloody crackling of all things!)- not something I’d recommend. Then just to add to our already chaotic lives I’ve taken on a bit of challenge- I’ve started a degree. I was thinking about my future back in December and realised that I would like to have a career change at some point but I’d also like to learn something new. I never went to uni and have worked since I was 15, I still haven’t figured out what I’d like to do when I grow up! But, after looking at some different options a degree in Environmental Science and Geography sung out to me from the Open University prospectus, in my head I was thinking of the September intake to tie in with the youngest starting school but there was a February intake and me being me I made the judgement call to just get started straight away. So, January was a bit hectic as I set up my work schedule to become super flexible to accommodate studying around raising a young family, whilst also applying for the actual degree itself. A few weeks in and it was definitely the right call to just crack on. I’m really enjoying the study material and it’s so flexible that I can pick up and leave off whenever I need to. Although I did have to have a chat with Polly and remind her that I was a student and not a lecturer as she got a bit ahead of the situation and started telling people I was teaching people at uni instead!

I won’t add much more as I feel like it hasn’t been the most interesting blog, just more of a catch up post and after only 3 hours sleep my brain is starting to work backwards- plus Clara’s bloody unicorn series that she’s become obsessed with is painfully luring me in again. I won’t leave it so long again as my time management is starting to get a lot better (she says confidently!).

I will just finish this one with a little nod towards a very special lady who we sadly had to say goodbye to at the beginning of the year. Henry’s Nanny Mary was a huge part of his life, as well as ours, and one of the kindest, gentlest souls I’ve ever had the pleasure of spending time with. I’m so thankful that the kids had so many precious times with her and we have some wonderful memories and photos that will keep her very much in our lives. I’m forever grateful for her love and support and we miss her greatly.

We did it! We actually managed the three school Christmas events this year! After so many cancellations, postponements and nativities behind closed doors, this year I actually got to sit on three different occasions to watch two nativities and a carol concert. And you can’t beat a primary school nativity. There’s the occasional child dive bombing the stage, someone discovers the microphone and so much frantic waving. Your child will turn their head away and start waving at their friend the moment you get a prime position to take a photo when the guy in front shifts slightly to the right. There’ll be someone picking their nose- last year it was Seb. Then the nursery nativity comes with even more carnage including Jesus being thrown into his manger.

We’ve also just got back from our last ever toddler group Christmas party/nativity. This was just pure chaos- good chaos though. Clara refused point blank to join the other kids on stage but chose to watch from the audience with one of her little besties. When I say chaos, I mean chaos. There was a child in the manger chilling, kids jumping off the stage, but it was just fabulous to watch. The kids had fun which is the most important bit.

I had thought that the key stage two carol concert would be slightly less chaotic, how wrong I was. Although, apart from my child air guitaring in the final performance, the parents actually caused the chaos. There was the Mum humming along so loud you could hear her over the kids, the same Mum then sat on Instagram during the performances that she wasn’t vibing with. Then the parents were invited to join in with the last song- the kids got a bit too enthusiastic and started singing too fast for the music meaning they were a line ahead, this caused most of us adults to get the giggles and we all struggled to get the song back on track before the last verse.

One Christmas plan that did go out the window though was our trip to the Bath Christmas markets which was supposed to happen on Saturday. After a hectic week the kids were knackered and weren’t on board with an early start, Clara was a bit croaky and we just didn’t want to risk another sickness drama so far from home so we changed plans and had a quiet morning and after lunch headed to Crealy. We went on some rides and watched the ice skating show which the kids were quite impressed with. Seb was then very brave and stroked a snake (the girls were cowering behind Henry refusing to come anywhere near the keepers). They also had a giant snail which stumped him a bit, he petted this one too and said it looked like a snail with a smile, we then pointed out it was a snail, a really big one. His face lit up and he replied “like a Daddy snail.”

The kids gave us some laughs when we checked our Euromillions ticket to find sadly we hadn’t won £200 million, we asked them what they would’ve bought if we had won. Polly opted for some horses from the toy shop, when I pointed out she could buy real horses with that kind of money her face lit up and she said yes please! Seb said he would get a big Christmas tree and a toy Thomas. Clara then outdid them all and asked for a ‘pretend house’ (dolls house) and a rainbow. Not sure how she’d get her hands on a rainbow but she was so serious about this that when we did get to Crealy and they wrote out another letter to Santa she made it top of her list. I might have to get creative with a little extra present to go in her stocking in the next few days.

As I say, it’s been another hectic week or so. I see a lot of posts on social media about how hard this time of year can be and it made me think how true this is. Don’t get me wrong, it’s my favourite time of year but it can be very overwhelming at times. There’s the seven different days they need to wear a Christmas jumper (different child and different reason each time). The child changing their mind over a present at the last moment. The three different locations and time slots for nativities and carol concerts. A playdate here and a party there. 600 extra Brownie events and another party for good measure. The poorly relative in hospital. The two parcels of presents you weren’t expecting. Working out when to give presents to each person as when will you see them again before the big day. The two million emails from the school. An extra present here. Another card there. Throw some more magic around for the kids. The cost of everything, including realising that the December pay check needs to last the 300 weeks of January. Flicking all the lights off after half an hour when you get a flashback of the last electric bill. A sickness bug here. Another cold there. A work do here. Another work do there. The excitable children, overstimulated and going into meltdown at the drop of a hat. A nativity outfit here. Another Christmas jumper day there. The party food for the class parties. Tinsel bits fucking everywhere. Missing the last bin collection and realising your big black bin is now full till Boxing Day. The lost gloves then twelve turn up at once. A bit more magic. Running out of sellotape mid wrapping.

But despite all this, still feeling forever grateful for it all. It really is the most magical time of year but we are also allowed to say it’s one of the most hectic times of year and although my heart has burst with joy many times over the last week or so, I have also cried three times too. This is why I have learnt over the years to say ‘no’ to some things as it really does become too much. It also means that the things you do say ‘yes’ to are more appreciated as they are the things you really do want to do. On that note, this probably is Merry Christmas from me. Thanks to anyone and everyone who’s taken the time to read any of my wild ramblings this year- it still baffles me that anyone reads them to be honest! And if anyone has any ideas on how I can get my hands on a rainbow then please drop me a message 😉

So, I’ve slacked off on the writing front again. In my defence this time of year is pretty hectic, but I have a spare half hour this morning so I’m just going to do a little post to get the ball back rolling again on the blog front.

The reason it’s been a bit more hectic than usual is thanks to the incessant sickness bugs that still keep being bought into the house- these have ranged from flu bugs to full blown sickness bugs and we currently have a child on the sofa asleep with the 4th different bug in 6 weeks. I’m hoping she sleeps the last of it off ready for her nativity in the morning as she’s been practising ‘Little Donkey’ on repeat for the last couple of weeks (sadly these are the only two words she can remember in the song!) but I’m not holding out much hope with the luck we’ve had- fingers crossed.

Christmas has officially landed in the house and the decorations have been up for a couple of weeks now, with more things being added every few days. It also means there’s usually a Christmas film playing on the TV. One of the favourites this year is actually Home Alone- they love watching both of them, although this has led to Seb calling us all ‘filthy animals!’ It did also lead to an amusing conversation when we asked the kids what they would actually do if they found themselves in Kevin’s situation, the big two both agreed it would be bad and they listed off the friend’s houses they’d go to instead.

Some other little TV related anecdotes include Polly whilst watching Harry Potter stating- “So, in 4 years my letter will come.” And another Polly classic when catching up with this week’s Strictly, they love watching the judge’s scoring and like to predict what number each judge will hold up. This week one of our favourite’s was scoring 10’s across the board and it was just Anton to go, Polly then shouted out- “Come on Anton sneak a little 10 out, they need it!”

She also gave me a laugh on Friday morning when we walked to school, the gritters had been out the night before which she had noticed when she commented- “look it definitely is cold as they’ve been out to lay the breadcrumbs.”

Seb has also given us a few laughs as he’s re-christened a Christmas legend. The other day I asked him which Christmas jumper he wanted to wear and he declared- ‘the Bruno one.’ Completely baffled I turned back to the dinosaur jumper and the Rudolph jumper in front of me trying to work out which one he meant, he then clarified- “the Bruno the red nose reindeer one.” And yes this name seems to have stuck.

Obviously, this time of year means the battle of the Christmas adverts. Our verdict this year is we quite like the racoon one (Lidl) and honestly the Tesco one made both Henry and I actually genuinely smile. It’s a very simple concept and just makes you feel a bit warm and fuzzy without trying to hard.

The change in weather over the last week did prompt Henry to take the kids on a little snow hunt the other day. I was at work and Henry had taken the car to take them to an after school party but then found he had an hour or so to kill before picking me up. So he took them up onto Dartmoor for a play in the snow. The girls had great fun by the looks of it whilst Seb stayed put in the car.

I will try and get another post in before the end of the year but with my track record it’s not looking likely. More fingers crossed!

Well, it’s been a bit of a week. Half term can be a bit knackering normally but I honestly think we all need another week off to recover this time round. We’ve been plagued with two different bugs in the house and the only one who’s come out unscathed so far is Henry. Polly and I are currently under a blanket watching This Morning hoping the end is finally in sight. Clara started the show last Tuesday then passed her sickness bug onto Seb by Thursday. He then recovered from that quite quickly but went down with the second bug on Friday night- one that he’s kindly passed onto myself and then Polly over the last 48 hours. The second bug is some sort of feverish sweaty shivering tiredness thing that leaves you feeling a bit drunk without the fun bits of actually being drunk. But the sad reality of being sick when you’re a parent can be summed up with the help of that Cinderella meme where she gets her make over and looks fabulous, you know the one with the caption that this is how mum’s feel after an uninterrupted shower, well this is true as I did feel a bit like a Queen when I stepped out of the shower this morning but sadly it’s back to the Cinderella life style of scrubbing and cleaning with a bump as 24 hours spent laying about in pjs means that the house looks like the scene in the new version where the carriage explodes back into a pumpkin.

But enough of our woeful never-ending saga of sickness, we did actually manage some fun in half term too. We took the kids to Crealy on the first Sunday to experience the Halloween fun there. We maybe should have listened to the warning about the two more scarier attractions not being suitable for younger children because of my goodness they were terrifying. It was good fun and the kids did see the funny side afterwards but Polly shouting “I’m not interested in that” all the way through the scary maze as various characters jumped out at us probably summed up how she was feeling at the time. I did try and go into them both with a determined attitude that it was just people dressed up and it would be fun, to try and make the kids feel more at ease- however, this did not go to plan and the first creepy fucker who jumped out at me made me scream and nearly wet my pants so that was it and the illusion of being brave was shattered. Safe to say they said they’d give it a miss next year.

Polly has got her own back twice though so I’m not feeling too guilty. The other night when I came out the bathroom in the dark she was stood outside the bathroom door in silence with no warning at all, luckily I’d just been for a wee or I really would have wet myself that time, I did end up on the floor swearing and crying with relief as she was giving off horror movie vibes and for a moment I thought I was getting a visit from that creepy arse girl in The Ring films. Just for good measure on another night she did that classic kid trick of stand by the side of the bed in complete silence so when you roll over and open your eyes to readjust the pillow there’s a silent starring child waiting by your head- similar reaction that time round.

She has also given us some very proud moments in the last couple of weeks. She made her promise at Brownie’s and officially became a Brownie with a big smile on her face as she did it. She also like the other two got glowing reports at parent’s evening which is always a relief. She’s also got her hands on one of my notebooks and has started writing down some of the stories and poems that she’s forever coming up with which honestly makes my heart sing. The girl has always got her head in a book and this week has started reading the Chronicles of Narnia. Raising a child who is very similar to you can be very frustrating sometimes as it is honestly like arguing into a mirror but when some of the traits of yourself that you actually quite like start coming out in that little mini-me then it makes all that other shit a lot more bearable.

Seb it seems is learning another of my lovely traits- sarcasm and dark humour. This I will only ever encourage though. Just the other day when we were in the car he asked what would happen if he weren’t wearing a seatbelt- straight to the point I told him that if we crashed he’d smash out of a broken window, go flying and probably die, his response- ‘well I would just wind the window down and then I’d just fly out the window instead and I’d be ok.’ His make me proud moment came a few days later, the kids were zoned out watching some crappy Ryan’s world YouTube video where his Mum was attempting to sing some ridiculous song about the planets that was honestly driving me to tears, when Seb turned round and said “Mummy, turn it off.” Hallelujah! He then went one step further and asked to watch the new Planet Earth episode again as he wanted to see the sharks again.

Henry has also introduced a new song to the kids growing music collection- ‘It’s Raining Men.’ This has quickly become one of Seb’s favourites, right up there with Karma Chameleon. Clara provided great entertainment when I was washing up the other day when she came running in to dance when Ella Henderson’s ‘Ghost’ started playing- it took us both straight back to a rainy field in July where we danced to it live. She’s also enjoying my constant playing of Taylor Swift and is well on her way to becoming a little Swiftie. This has gone up a notch since I went with a friend to see the Era’s tour at the local cinema- it was by the way an incredible night out and I am still buzzing off it even now. Girl can put on a show.

Anyway time for me to go back to being raggedy Cinderella as the washing machine has just beeped at me again. Hopefully the next post will be without any ailments but the rate we’re going I think it more likely that I have had a visit from an actual fairy Godmother.

So today’s post is actually a re-blog from way back in April 2021- which feels like a whole lifetime ago. I feel quite passionately about this topic, Henry has had to endure several rage filled rants about this topic only in the last week so I figured I’d share my thoughts on it again for everyone to suffer!

Here it is copied straight from the original post…

So, as I start getting ready to go back to work after a mix of maternity leave and furlough there are lots of emotions swirling through my brain as it’s been a weird year and this is the last mat leave. One of those emotions was guilt and then I sat one morning and thought- why do I feel that?

There’s no #dadguilt trending, but I can guarantee I’ll read #mumguilt at least once a day- even I’m guilty of using this phrase. Well today I’m saying no more (and please feel free to point out if I use it again in future!) because I’m making a vow from this moment to shove that phrase up my arse.

Why should I feel guilty? Why should working make me feel guilty? I’m providing for my family. Why should being a stay at home mum make me feel guilty? I’m raising my kids in a way that suits my family. Why should I feel guilty if I don’t bring a penny of income into my family home if my partner (which indicates a team unit) does work while I deal with the childcare. Why does my worth need a financial basis? Why should I feel guilty if I have an afternoon ‘off’ and get my nails done, go for a cinema date with a friend or spend an hour sitting on the beach with the sun in my face? We all need time to recharge in life so why as a mum am I being pushed to feel guilty for showing my kids that there is more to me than ‘mum’, there is ‘me.’ But, if I choose to not do any of that and don’t want ‘me time’ right now- then guess what? That’s nobodies business either.

Social media is great for many things but it is also responsible for pushing this stupid movement. Picture perfect playrooms on Instagram that are too perfect to even be played in, that make some feel guilty because they can’t recreate them and are pushed to feel guilt at their second hand toy box that actually provides laughter from a grateful and happy child. Fuck that guilt.

Those going on about the organic home made meals they’ve prepared for a baby whose probably going to throw most of it up the walls, but this is triggering guilt in the 9-5 working mum whose plated up chicken nuggets and chips (that will end up in clean plates by the way!). Fuck that guilt.

The page full of hourly snaps of a child with the #blessed #preciousmoments #nevermissamoment that a frazzled mum stumbles on during her 10 minute break in a 9 hour shift away from her #blessing, who is told she could ‘be there for every moment’ if she makes a ‘lifestyle change’ that actually only suits about 0.001% of the population and makes her question for a moment what she’s doing, when actually she’s doing exactly what is right for her family. Fuck that guilt.

The mum who is home 24/7 with her six kids who pops to have her hair done and gets greeted with the comment- “oh is your husband treating you?” Fuck that guilt and that judgement. She’s treating herself like the queen she is for bringing up those six kids.

The mum in the shoe shop trying to usher her excited school starter away from the £40 shoes and instead pointing out the pretty ribbon on the £5 ones she can afford. Fuck that guilt.

The mum watching her excited school starter trying on those £40 shoes with her heart bursting with pride while trying not to make the other mum feel bad. Fuck that guilt.

The mum working round the clock to pay for a dream holiday to Disney who misses the ‘first steps’ working an extra shift, trying to picture the look of wonder meeting Mickey Mouse will bring to make up for a different missed milestone. Fuck that guilt.

The mum who quits work altogether to raise her miracle IVF baby and soak up every minute who declines a zoo play date as the budget of one household income means the priorities have shifted. Fuck that guilt.

The chat at the baby sensory group about everyone’s birth experiences that triggers a whole rollercoaster of emotions for the mum who didn’t experience the birth she wanted or planned. Fuck that guilt.

Breast fed. Bottle fed

Baby led weaning. Purée food.

Baby groups. No groups.

Buying everything new. Buying everything second hand.

Back to work. Work from home. No work.

Fuck all that guilt.

The whole concept of mum guilt can quite frankly do one. I’m just a mum like many others- doing what is right and best for my kids, for me, for my husband- for our family. I am perfectly entitled to live my best life without being judged by anyone- including me, especially me. I should not be encouraged to feel guilt unless I’m actually harming my kids (or anyone else!) and last time I checked… my kids are doing just fine- thanks to me (and Henry of course!), so why the hell should I feel guilty for anything I do to achieve that?

I’ve been slacking on the blog front again, I did actually write up 2 blogs during the summer holidays but never got round to finishing them, let alone publishing them- oops. The summer holidays themselves feel an absolute whirling blur of a lifetime ago and the rate September is flashing past it will be Christmas before we know it (what a shame!).

The back to school haze has definitely been a shock to the system for all concerned and I’m getting by on an hour by hour basis at the moment- just until we get properly back into the swing of things, but for now I’m relying on phone reminders and the usual 78 emails a day from the school.

The great summer holiday itself was definitely a mixed bag. Don’t get me wrong we had a lot of fun and absolutely made some core memories however the weather really wasn’t great, in the words of Seb “it’s been a bit shit Mummy.” There was also a lot of whining and fighting, constant pestering for snacks and the cherry on top was Clara learning a new phrase- “fucking hell” which yes she is saying in context. Great.

Seb has also come out with some other hilarious comments recently including- “Oh no, my arms have lost their strong.” And the fact his new word of choice is ‘cranky’ from – “oh dear she’s a bit cranky” when someone has a strop near him to “oh that doggy is a bit cranky” when a dog woofed near him the other day. But I’m still reeling from Polly a while back with her- “Mummy, your kids are being really annoying,” (you said it mate, not me).

But now it seems Autumn has well and truly landed so I’m busy trying to do a glove inventory whilst boxing up summer dresses and muttering “for fuck’s sake” a lot as each time I put washing outside I have to drag it back in half an hour later thanks to…. oh the irony of all irony there- I had to pause to go get the bloody washing back in and lost my train of thought!

Parenting this week has also had a few interesting moments this week and some of the phrases that have left my mouth have left even me a bit shell shocked… “No, we don’t put dice up our bums.” “I don’t care if you are pretending to be a Pokémon, you absolutely are not to use the cat’s litter tray and if I wake up in the morning to find you’ve laid a turd in there then you are absolutely responsible for getting it out.” As I say, it’s been a chaotic week or so.

We’ve also had some changes to the after school schedule. Polly’s gone up in the world of Guiding to Brownies and Seb has joined the dancing world by starting a dance class- they both love the new additions, especially Seb who keeps showing us his new moves. Clara is also doing more nursery sessions which although they have knackered her a bit at times, she’s pretty happy about- she has a lot of fun there and particularly loves all the outside play (the 3 loads of bagged up dirty outfits was testament to that the other day- but hey that’s what I have a washing machine for!).

The extra child free time during the day is proving to be a bit of a novelty, this morning I went for a big walk along the coastal path, it’s given me a chance to just sit and read without interruptions, I’ve been able to purge the toy boxes without things being snuck back in that are suddenly “my most favourite toy in the world” even though they forgot it existed 2 years ago. It is still crazy how quick it goes and before you know it you’ve got a little person stood in front of you shouting that you’ve put the wrong Waffle doggy on and then shouting when the ‘correct’ one isn’t downloading fast enough.

On that note I’m going to wrap this up, Waffle doggy is honestly the most distracting thing the children suggest watching- mainly as I want to punch Simon in the face every time he opens his stupid mouth to say anything but I do also need to do the jobs I neglected this morning in my bid for freedom up in the woods. I’ll try not to leave it quite so long again.

We are on day three home from our second festival experience and I think I’ve almost caught up on the washing and organising so I’m sitting down for a bit to write up this post whilst the festival buzz is still high in the house. As I say we are fresh back from Camp Bestival in Dorset, with glitter still coming out of every shower, tents still not back fully in the cupboard and several jumpers still hanging up drying. It was our second time going to this festival and honestly I couldn’t recommend it enough. We went two years ago when the kids were aged 5,3,1 and this time they were 7,5,3 and this time I thought I’d write a bit of a survival guide for anyone looking for a bit of guidance or even a bit of persuasion to give it a go- I’m by no means a festival or even a camping expert but I figured even a couple of tips might be worth sharing. So here it is in no particular order…

Picking which one to go to. This one was recommended to us by a fellow Mum and the great thing is it’s local to us and also aimed specifically at families- Mr Tumble is a headline act! There are a range of activities for all different ages though which makes it feel very inclusive.

Acts and Activities. We booked early when it was cheaper and it also meant we could spread the cost with a payment plan. This does however mean that the main act list hadn’t been announced so it’s always a gamble on when to book, but there are so many things to do at this festival though that even if there had been a poor line up there would still be plenty to do. Once the list was up though I sat with the kids and went through asking them which ones they would like to see so nobody missed out. However, things don’t always go to plan (see my next point!) and although I made a list of 35 things we actually only ticked off 13 of those.

Lower your expectations. If you read the point above and thought we would be disappointed with only seeing 13 of our great huge list of 35 you’d be massively mistaken. That still means we had 13 amazing experiences that we planned for and it meant we had loads more experiences that we weren’t planning on having when we stumbled across activities or acts that weren’t on our list and sometimes these impromptu ones turned out to be the best. Like the theatre show we walked into on Saturday night and loved so much we went back for their Sunday performance too (they performed a show each night where the kids joined in the acting but also the kids made the story up as the show went on and nothing was off limits whether it be a supervillain with a ‘death touch’ who moved from place to place with the power of his farts, to a group of 20 kids on stage all playing trees so that no one was left out). Then there was us taking a chance on the ‘surprise guest’ telling a bedtime story in the CBeebies tent instead of seeing one of our original list and landing an amazing experience of Justin Fletcher (aka the main man Mr Tumble himself) reading a story. But basically don’t put too much pressure on yourself or on the kids- it’s a lot to take in for everyone and can be really overstimulating at times, in fact it’s a rare moment when everyone in the group on fully on board at the same time with whatever was going on so just roll with it and don’t force it (for example a music act might be 45 minutes long and they might get up for a couple of songs then sit down for the next half hour before getting up for the last bit- the point is let them do their thing and if it’s just you up and dancing for 20 minutes then so be it, you’ve come to a festival to have fun yourself too!).

Throw that routine out the window. There is absolutely no point and no chance of sticking to a routine at a festival so don’t even try.

Prepare for all weather. We were lucky the first time we went and only saw one small rain shower. This time we were not so lucky. It rained- a lot. Sunday morning and night were an absolute wash out and we got soaked and filthy. Luckily I’d packed all the waterproofs and even the woolly hats just in case and boy did they get some use- I think it’s the first time I’ve worn a woolly hat on my birthday ever! But the best advice if the forecast is looking iffy would be just accept that you will get filthy and the sooner you accept it the sooner you’ll enjoy it (plus we all have washing machines at home to deal with that later so embrace the mud!), just make sure wellies are top of the pack list!

Packing. I love making a list anyway so for this sort of thing I’m in my element. Make that pack list as soon as possible so you know what extra things you need to buy and can stagger to cost plus you won’t end up panic buying on the way there or even whilst you’re there. Some essentials for the list include- wellies, ear defenders for the kids, toilet roll paper, anti bac gel, potty (even if just for night-time with the older kids), first aid kit and snacks, snacks and more snacks- pack all the snacks! And don’t forget the wellies. I also packed up a ‘stuck in the tent’/distraction bag for the kids, this included some small toys, sticker books and a couple of books. This bag saved my sanity whilst I was setting up and taking down the tents.

Tents. Yes we did take two tents. We have a 4 man tent and now also have a larger 6 man tent and this time we took both. This was a game changer. It meant we had more space in the larger sleeping tent and we used the smaller tent to store everything. Although the distraction bag kept them occupied for a while I did also rope them in to packing away this time- mainly as I was taking the tents down in the rain and wind and they would have blown away if not for some extra hands. So both times we made the choice to leave late on the last day instead of staying that extra night and leaving the Monday morning. The journey home wasn’t very long so we preferred to head home late and get into our own beds instead of hanging around. This meant packing away the tent on the Sunday morning each time which was tricky in this years weather but the Monday morning wasn’t much better so there was no avoiding the rain anyway.

Quiet time. As I’ve said a festival can be quite overwhelming for the little people so it definitely pays to have some quiet times every now and then so they can have some down time and everyone can recharge. There were a couple of areas suited to this, but then sometimes all you need is half an hour on the edge of the field with a cup of tea and the sticker books- we did this on Saturday afternoon whilst Clara had a nap in the wagon during Gok Wan’s DJ set (bit of a surreal experience on it’s own).

Keeping costs down. The first time we went we made the mistake of queuing for over an hour and paying a small fortune for the face paint tent, this time we took stick on tattoo’s and glitter and avoided that. We also made sure to take flower headbands, fairy wings etc so you don’t get the kids pestering for everything they walk past. We avoided the fairground rides this time as they are so crazy expensive- last time we limited it to one ride a day- but this time it would have worked out around £18 for us all to have a ride so we just made excuses each time and distracted them with other things.

Phone charging. We pre paid for a phone charging locker each time and we absolutely made use of it. Other ideas include getting a solar powered charger which might be something we invest in for the future.

Kids hair. Polly is still rocking her Rapunzel hair which could be a nightmare in a muddy wet environment so I kept her hair plaited up all weekend and just added glitter here and there- much easier than trying to tame it every hour when it’s down.

The wagon. So the first time we went Clara was only just one so we just took the trusty pushchair and winged it. This did work ok but this time we invested in the wagon. It was a game changer. I did quite a bit of research before buying as the last thing you want is to spend over £100 on something that breaks on it’s first use. Boy did we put this thing through it’s paces and (touch wood) it’s come out the other side. It was perfect for taking all the equipment to and from the car. It was great when Clara needed a nap on the go with the bags in there. And it was a lifesaver at almost 11PM on the final wet walk back up the muddy hill to the car to go home when we threw all three kids in. For anyone who’s interested we went for the Aunotism collapsible Garden wagon with a 100KG capacity and we got it off Amazon for £90. It didn’t come with a rain cover but we just chucked a couple of pushchair rain covers over it (sometimes my hoarding pays off and we actually have three of these even though we only have one pushchair left!). The wheels were fairly muddy by that last run though but I had a few spare nappy bags which were easy to slip onto each wheel for that journey home.

So, would I recommend a festival for a young family- absolutely! Plus if anyone has any other festivals they’d recommend then any suggestions are welcome. Just always remember- don’t forget to pack the wellies!