25th Aug 2017

I cannot believe it’s almost the end of August and with it the summer holidays. I know Polly isn’t school age but most of the toddler groups we attend aren’t on in the holidays so we’ve been totally out of sync and to be honest I think we’ve exhausted the park. So what’s new? Well Henry is still applying for more jobs. He’s now decided to do some investigating to see whether he can do his re-training while staying in his current job. This would sort of be a life-saver as it means we won’t take the wage cut that’s quite frankly putting the fear of God into us after I knocked up a list of all our outgoings. It wasn’t pretty!

After doing said list I realised I needed to be taking more action to try and help our current situation. So I’ve become one of them (Sorry Pati but this phrase just made me laugh a little), that is- an Avon girl. I think I’ve just about got my head around it and thought I might as well give it a bash. It sounds a bit dramatic but it’s put me right out of my comfort zone- not just because I’ve been off work since May last year. I don’t want to become that annoying person who posts annoying sales pitches all over Facebook and private messages all her friends making them feel super awkward. I don’t want pity sales and I don’t want to make things uncomfortable. So not sure why I’ve picked this role to be honest! But apparently it sells itself so we’ll see what happens.

In Polly news. Well, she’s developed a really annoying and frankly dangerous new habit. Her and the cat have got on really well since we threw them together 14 months ago in the matchbox house we lived in at the time. Even here, where he has more space to flee and more hiding spaces then he could ever have dreamed of in any of his 28 lives (this cat is not normal and has definitely gone past 9). Well now she thinks it’s hilarious to rugby tackle him. I’m not talking just being a little bit rough with him, I’m talking she throws herself onto him- think Will Ferrell in Elf when he brings the Christmas tree down. Actually they pretty much recreated this scene only yesterday when Pickle attempted to jump over the stair gate to the safety of the kitchen, unfortunately Polly had a hold of his tail. He pretty much fell back onto her and all she could do was laugh at him. To be honest I may have hidden round the corner in the kitchen to have a silent laugh (after making sure the cat wasn’t actually harmed of course). It was a classic ‘You’ve been framed moment’, although I wasn’t filming so I’m going to have to find another time for them to earn me £250. I just want to state that she’s not actually hurt him in any way, I have no doubt he would fight back if that were the case and he’s not stupid (well he is a bit) he will take himself away when he’s not entertaining her shit. And to all those ‘my-child-would-never-do-that perfect mummies out there, we are saying no when she does any of this stunts and then showing her how to GENTLY (honestly I’ve said the word ‘gentle’ so many times the last week or so I think the cat is starting to think we’ve changed his name) stroke him. Shockingly though she’s a toddler who’s learning so this isn’t going to happen over night. Anyway, enough of me making excuses for my child and my parenting, I don’t think I really owe anyone an explanation, except maybe the cat, but he doesn’t understand English, so Whiskers Temptations will have to do.